So Much To Celebrate

The world keeps going and somehow I do too. I don't feel like the world around me is real some days. Some days I wake up and long to run and check on my girl, but the reality sets in that she is no longer with us and I just want to scream. I am not okay but I am trying to be the best that I can be with the situation that I have been handed.

With each little moment, each accomplishment, and each growth, there is something that feels so wrong. She is not here with us to celebrate. She doesn't get to be here celebrating and all celebrations still feel so wrong without her.

There is so much going on and there have been so many big things for our family in the past few months, but no matter how much we want things to be different, they won't be. I have such a hard time seeing happy moments for others because I just want her to be here having her happy moments too.

So, I guess that I should update where we all are and what has been happening in our lives.

Huxley is rostering in both JV and Varsity for football. He has said that he does not think that we are going to see him play varsity, but the fact that he has rostered is still a HUGE accomplishment since he is at a bigger school. I am so proud of him for working so hard to be able to do the things that he loves. He is almost benching 150 lbs too which is more than he weighs. I am so impressed by his hard work and dedication to something he loves so much.

Althea got inducted into the International Thespian Society. I am so proud of her to get out there and do the things that she loves. I do miss seeing Adeline dancing and acting on stage with her, but the ways that she continues to grow on that stage are impressive and is something that I am incredibly blessed to be able to watch. She thinks that she is going to minor in Theater Arts when she is in college so dance and being on stage really have been a lifelong accomplishment of hers.

Andrew is doing great. He is thriving and has been able to get hired to the school where he most wanted to get a job. I am so proud of him. His graduation was great and we got to celebrate with him as a family and he even got to have a couple of friends there to support him. I just am so proud and so pleased with the way in which he was able to be successful with everything that life has handed him.

For me, I am in the final round of a full time position interview process. My goal was to make it to the final round. I am not certain that I am going to get the job, but I am happy with myself and proud to have made it to this point. So much of what has been shared with me about the job is furthering my passions to make a difference and give back to the world with some greater purpose. I have so many ideas about what could be done to make things better for those who are going to be in my classrooms.

Finally, Shane is still working hard and the best husband and dad that he can be. I am so blessed and know that our children are incredibly blessed and fortunate for them to be able to be in the space that they are in. He is such a kind, loving, and supportive person that he just makes all of our lives better. It kills me that he has to live with this pain of losing Adelnie too.

I really miss the world as it was. The world where we got to be with our little girl each and every day. The world where we got to enjoy her laughter, her jokes, her hugs, and her love. I would give anything to have her here with me and I will forever long to be with her, but until that. day comes, I am trying my best and my hardest to live for the other kids and Shane. Those are the things that truly matter the most.